Monday, October 10, 2005

It's a Super Target - Not a Super Experience

As many of you already know, Target is one of my favorite hobbies! Well, a few months ago I was enlightened to the fact that my Broadview Target was going to be reborn as a Super Target. Jeanette can verify, I was so excited...I just couldn't wait - I should have known that it was too good to be true!

As Don and I are approaching the Super Target, we see what looks like a never ending sea of cars (at the regular Target I could usually maneuver myself a pretty good spot, right by the door!) and boat loads of people just filing into my Super Target. I was thinking, "okay...It is a Super Target so there will be more room for all of these people." The overwhelming amount of people did not ruin my excitement, I was very excited! After we hunt down a parking spot and start to walk towards the door, it seemed as if every person walking about had crawled straight out of a trailer park or ghetto (yes, yes, I do know that it is Broadview we are talking about), but still I was shocked by the hoards of ugly people. I did get a kick out of the little ethnic girl humping the huge red Target ball (there are big red Target balls placed about every 15 Feet outside, so no one drives their car through the front of the store). Don was already disenchanted, but I still remained hopeful.

We decided that we were going to grab a Starbucks drink before we embarked on our Super Target spree, another one of my favorite hobbies...Starbucks! Well needless to say, those baristas didn't get a tip...At least a monetary tip! When it was finally my turn to order, I ordered two venti (that's the fancy term for large) iced caramel macchiatos, one low fat. Does that seem too difficult or challenging in anyway that I don't know about? Considering the fact that you work at Starbucks, I would assume that you would be use to getting drinks request and maybe even have some special requests once in a while. Well dumb ass proceeds to hand me a tall (that's the fancy term for small) latte. I politely said, "I ordered two venti caramel macchs." She replied, with an attitude, "No, you didn't." I then pulled out my receipt and said, "Okay, there are a couple of things wrong with this piece of paper then, I paid for two venti drinks and you are trying to hand me ONE tall latte , is that perhaps someone else's?" I did not receive an actual answer at that time, just a huff and a cold shoulder. I did watch very carefully as she was making my drinks that no foreign substance ended up in the cup...spit for example. She then loudly calls out, "two venti caramel macchiatos, iced and one non fat." I could in fact hear her, even without the screaming, because I was in fact still standing at the drink pick up area...Approximately one and a half feet away from her. I grabbed the drinks and my own straws, from behind the counter and walked away...With the free tall latte too! By the way, the whole time I was dealing with the idiot from Starbucks, Don was off hunting down a cart...Because of course there can't be any in the store front cart area!

So we finally begin our shopping endeavor to find out that Super Target is not that super at was really disappointing. The isles were so small that you couldn't fit two carts side by side down them, there were too many people (found some yuppies too), there were too little workers, there were too many overpopulated families (not Super Target's fault), and there were too many attitudes for one store.

I would recommend Super about a month or so...once the initial excitement wears down...sorry, I am one of those people to blame for the mad rush. I, however; use proper shopping etiquette. I don't leave my cart in the middle of the fucking isle, I don't wander aimlessly through the store, I don't make a fucking mess, I don't eat the product as I browse, I don't walk like I was just awoken from a comma, I don't have 8 children running around like monkeys, I don't get to the checkout counter and have the lady scan everything to double check the price, I don't have the checkout lady take like 10 fucking things off of my bill because I don't have enough do that while you shop moron, I don't do a lot of other things that create bad shoppers!

I will continue to be a loyal Target shopper and revisit Super Target in a month or so...for now...I will try to enjoy the longer ride to the Target in Lombard!


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Sarah said...

So ask me at work and I will show you how to get rid of these crap spam comments. Target sounds liek oh so much fun. No offense to anyone who is Mexican but try shopping by the border. It is just like you described but like all the time.

Jeanette said...

How disappointing! After all of the built up excitement, the long nights dreaming about the endless happiness the Super Target could bring all to come crashing down around you. Did you get to see the Pizza Hut at the Target at all? I would imagine that it would be a scene similar to the McDonalds at the Walmart, which if caught on tape could make us quite the load of cash on Funniest Home Videos. Instead of humping red Target balls (hehe) the little girls (and once in awhile I assume a boy) hump Ronald.