Thursday, June 07, 2007

Boner Issues!


Christopher Woods has sued the maker of the health drink Boost Plus, claiming the vitamin-enriched beverage gave him an erection that would not subside and caused him to be hospitalized. He bought the beverage, drank it and then the next morning he woke up "with an erection that would not subside" and sought treatment that day for the condition, called priapism. He underwent surgery for implantation of a Winter shunt, which moves blood from one area to another. Woods later had problems that required a hospital visit and penile artery embolization, a way of closing blood vessels.
Does anyone else find if hilarious that his last name is Woods??? Oh, I am dying here, really that is funny shit! If he drank the beverage at night and then woke up with a woody (he he he) how are they sure that it is from the Boost Plus? I would love love love to be a juror in that case, although I would probably be held in contempt of court because of my uncontrolled laughter roaring through the court room!

54 comments:

captain corky said...

Woods is suing Boost for a hard on that wouldn't quit? What a dick.

Jenny! said...

Captain:
Will you laugh obnoxiously with me in the juror's box???

Dan Mega said...

Does he realize how much money he can make in porn with the infinite stiffy?

Jenny! said...

Mega Dan:
You should tell him that...cuz you ain't got to be good looking in porn, you just need a stiffy that will last!

Sarah said...

I know no guys whi would actually be worried about long term morning wood, happy yes, worried no!

mutleythedog said...

I have this problem whenever I visit this blog- however on other occasions maybe nature does need a hand... What was the name of that stuff again?

They should charge the bastard by the day....

Jenny! said...

Sarah:
I don't know any either! But, It could get embarrasing...like when you talking to your girlfriends friend and then it just kind of pops out!

Jenny! said...

Mutley:
I am glad my blog gives you wood! I can be happy knowing that I have succeeded!

Flyinfox_SATX said...

Talk about taking your one and only "Stiff" Drink. My 7 year old loves Boost...especially Chocolate. Maybe he can take the stand here as a character witness.

Flyinfox_SATX

Jenny! said...

Flyinfox:
Would he be comfortable giving his statement while I am dying with laughter???

RAFFI said...

i remember when bob dole said, "bob dole doesn't bob dole or bob dole president, viagra bob dole and e.d. bob dole are vietnam bob dole." i thought boost was some nasty geriatric supplement that tasted liek old people... i guess it's a red bull, but gives you priaprism rather than wings.

Jenny! said...

Raffi:
So clever...."i guess it's a red bull, but gives you priaprism rather than wings."

Oh, i love your comments!

jungle jane said...

what a goose. why didn't he take a week's holiday and stay at home with a fat stash of porn??

captain corky said...

Jenny: Of course. I also want to shoot spit balls at Woody.

snowelf said...

Awesome! This can be their new slogan:

Wood you like another Boost?

--snow

I'd SO laugh with you! We'd be held in contempt of court for sure.

Yoda said...

Oh man. Don't you see the great business potential in this case? Clearly, having lots of vitamins can give you erections!! LOL!! Now, we can stop making Viagra and make cheap ass vitamin pills as a substitute ;-)

If he gets erections drinking vitamin drinks, there's something REALLY wrong with him.

Michael C said...

You just know his friends talked him into the lawsuit as a joke because of his last name.

Winter Shunt? What the heck does a Summer Shunt do? I can understand what a Spring Shunt might do though...

Ratty. said...

Jenny.
It is a known fact that the penis has a tiny brain in its head. It is able to think independently from man's main brain and can always overrule any decisions made by number 1.
All that happened here was that Mr Wood's Knob brain made an irreversible decision.
As a matter of interest my knob brain has an IQ. of 300.

Jenny! said...

JJ:
And some loose hookers!

Jenny! said...

Captain:
Can you teach me as I have never shot spit balls before...I just catch them!

Jenny! said...

Snowelf:
So, cheesy but I love it love it love it. My grandparents drink Boost alot so next time I am over, I aske them that...I am sure i will pass out from laughing, and they will think I have gone over the edge!

Jenny! said...

Yoda:
Clearly there was some kind of pre-existing malfunctioning dick condition as that is so not normal!

Jenny! said...

Boost Boner's the Vitamin Way!

Jenny! said...

Michael C:
I have no idea what a Winter Shunt is...I even tried finding that out on WebMD...wiht no luck!

I would like ot hang out wiht his friends if there were able to talk him into that suit!

Jenny! said...

Ratty:
That is impressive...Can your cock hold conversations??? I would love to have a chat sometime!

Mike M said...

Hard head with a hard on for supplementals. And he got one from it too.

Count me in the jury!!

minijonb said...

I still don't understand what Mr. Woods was complaining about... I'd be jumping up and down and flashing myself all over the place
=;-)

Jenny! said...

Mike M:
He got a supplemental boner...oh, that was funnier in my head!

Jenny! said...

Minijonb:
I'm sure you would try to do alot more than flash it!

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