Monday, July 23, 2007

Drunk Whore Moron!

A woman who tried to dance on the bar at a tavern is now suing the bar after she fell and shattered her ankle. She is seeking more than $50,000 in damages for her injuries at Samy's Bar and Grill in Joliet (white trash capital of Illinois). She fell while trying to climb up onto the bar and is suing Samy's for "allowing her to climb upon the bar without a step-stool, ladder or other device used for safety. They encouraged their patrons to dance on the bar -- they cajole them, they yell at them, but they fail to take any safety precautions whatsoever," said the woman's attorney. She completely shattered her right ankle. She has had three surgeries on her ankle after the injury and the attorney representing the bar and its owners, said the lawsuit was the first anyone at the bar had heard of the incident.


All I have to say is fucking whore moron! You gonna dance on the bar...you better not be so wasted that your skank ass falls off of it and busts your shit! Dumb bitch! You shouldn't be allowed to sue because you are stupid!

45 comments:

mutleythedog said...

Yay! Im second! I had a pub for three years Jenn! These kinds of skank whore morons haunt your dreams...

Crushed by Ingsoc said...

There a few girls at my local pub dance on the tables during karaoke Sunday night.

Great viewing.

Lady Tickle said...

Right on Jen !

Bugwit said...

I'll bet they encouraged her to drink intoxicating beverages, too!!

So, question...

If she had gone out a fucked some faceless guy who name she can't remember, but who's odor she'll never forget...and gotten pregnant, does that mean the bar should pay child support?

Hmmm...

Hi Jenny...seen you around, thought I'd visit. ;-)

jungle jane said...

*takes note of Samy's Bar and Grill's address and starts practising her "slipped over on a banana whilst doing the robot" routine. Sits back and waits for the coin to roll in*

chuckdaddy2000 said...

Ah America. The land of opportunity to drunk whore morons who want to dance on bars.

Unfortunately, I bet she wins.

snowelf said...

I bet she wins too...

--snow

Yoda said...

Dancing on the bar turns me off! If its a club, why not dance on the floor? Dumb bitches (some gay guys too) are such big attention whores that they NEED to have *everyone* look at them while they shake that skank ass!

Ashley said...

I prefer to dance on tables. I find that the overall surface area is greater, and hence, one is less likely to fall and shatter one's ankle.

My brother broke his ankle on a boat ramp (the insurance company paid for the surgeries, etc.), but maybe he could have sued because they really should have kept the ramp dry and sludge free, even though it does lead into a river.

I am all in favor of frivolous litigation. It really makes the world go 'round. I am wracking my brains to figure out who I can sue.

Nocturnal said...

Definitely agreed, gold digger there.

NamesAreHardToPick said...

Yeah, people should pass an IQ test before they are allowed to sue.

Mighty Dyckerson said...

You tell 'em, sweetheart! Man, you turn me on when you curse!

Michael C said...

It'll be fun watching the attorneys for the bar make her look like a complete stupid dillweed!!

TheBirdman33 said...

hey hey hey...
if people couldn't sue frivolously because of their own stupidity, most lawyers and judges in this country would be out of work.
Do YOU want to contribute to unemployment?

Em said...

Was she pissed? If not, she might actually get away with it....(If the rest of the clientel encouraged her to pour spirits all over herself and set herself on fire would she do it I wonder....). If she was drunk then maybe the bar had a responsibility to stop her...hmm but if she was drunk she's even more of an idiot...But with a smashed up ankle I hope she's learnt her lesson...ouch

Mike M said...

Rock on, Jenny!!. I love your no holds barred look at stupid people! And this woman (and her lawyer) are stupid!

James said...

I couldn't agree more, stupid tart. Was she pretty?

Kelly said...

what an idiot. It probably happened when she was on her way home, and she just said it happened at the bar... wait is it Steph? She did have that whole lost shoe, hurt foot...

wait... other side of the world... sorry.

captain corky said...

Is this the same bitch that sued McDonalds because she burned her mouth with coffee?

Sassy Blondie said...

This kind of shit is why when there is a real injustice, it can't be righted. It's like those fatasses suing McDonald's for making them fat. WTF? Once it came out that they ate super-sized meals everyday from McDonald's, some judge gained a brain and threw it out. I'm sure this one will be thrown out too as long as the bar doesn't cave.

Stupid drunk whore moron indeed!

Jenny! said...

Mutley:
Being 2nd is better than 1st!!! Damn skanks!

Crushed:
Karaoke....how horrible! The only way that karaoke is ok is if there is nudity involved!

Lady Tickle:
Thanks! Do you own a bar in Joliet???

Bugwit:
They probably forced her to buy $5 shots and held her mouth open for her to drink! Very good question! THanks for your visit...come again real soon!

Jungle Jane:
It's a good plan, you could accidentally fall down their stairs and claim there was a loose nail! Oh, wait...that's my plan...you stick with the banana!

ChuckDaddy:
I bet she does too, pathetic!

Snow:
Yep...fucking bullshit!

Yoda:
If you are a skank, then of course you need attention...floors aren't good enough for skank whores..only bars and laps will do!

Ashley:
Litigation gives me a job...so sue on idiot ass motherfuckers...sue on! I thought we weren't going to discuss our table dancing ways on my blog...now we have been outed as skank whores!

Nocturnal:
Being a gold digger requires some amount of skill, I think that would be giving her too much credit!

Namesarehardtopick:
Totally a good idea!

Dyckerson:
Sweetheart??? You going soft on me motherfucker???

Michael C:
Yes, they will probably make her cry! Dumb dillweed!

Birdman33:
You are right, my job depends on this shit...well not really like this type of shit...but similar!

Em:
I seriously doubt she has learned a lesson here...and she probaly would set herself on fire if prompted!

Mike M:
I call it like I see it!

James:
I am assuming, from the area the bar was in, that NO, she was NOT pretty!

Kelly:
I was thinking the same thing! Just kidding Steph...you are so not like this girl!

Captain:
Probably...fucking moron!

Jenny! said...

Sassy:
I think the bar might cave on this one and settle. That shit wiht MCDonalds and the fat people...fuckin' A...that was BULLSHIIIIITTTT!!!!

SMARTBuddy said...

Yeah, hating people who make a mockery out the system. It makes normal people have to read warnings on packets of nuts that they 'may contain traces of nuts'. Idiots!

RAFFI said...

litigation sucks balls. this drunk whore moron can also suck my balls. while i'm at it, all the women can suck my balls.

Crushed by Ingsoc said...

I've done it topless...

ADW said...

This is where I use my new favorite grouping of swearwords - cumguzzling twatmonger.

What a stupid effing bitch.

DONE.

zen wizard said...

I dunno--I danced on a bar in Cancun at this bar where they let people dance on the bar.

In the midst of shaking my groove thing, a thought popped into my head--was this really a wise decision?

(I mean dancing on the bar, and not Cancun in general, but we can talk about the prudence of a 45-year-old guy vacationing in Cancun in a separate discussion if you like.)

In other words, alcohol and dancing on a floor--debatably--mix. But on a bar? On elevated, polished oak?

I think you should be sober as a judge--or Howard Dean--before you dance on a bar.

random moments said...

Some people are just waiting for their moment to sue. I wonder if she would have still tried to sue the bar if she had slipped after she was on the bar dancing. Would she then sue the bar for selling alcohol that made her shitty enough to climb on the bar in the first place?

Brian in Oxford said...

I want the bar to counter-sue for defamation and lost revenue. She's giving them a bad name for no reason of their own.

Bugwit said...

My pleasure.

And since I missed the last post, let me just say that you have the second best rack I have ever seen!

MyUtopia said...

People are crazy.

Jenny! said...

Smartbuddy:
Or do not use laundry basket as sled! Fucktards ruin everything!

Raffi:
You must not be a supporter of feminism! Now if I said that all men should suck my tits...that would be a totally different meaning!

Crushed:
I love a set of bitch tits on a man!

ADW:
Love the cumguzzling...will def. use that one! Thanks!

Zen:
If people are sober while dancing on bars...the chances of tit flasing and sneakpeaks up skirts diminishes!

Random Moments:
Word! People are pathetic and will make up things to sue for...they think its easy money!

Brian In Oxford:
She is, the bar owner didn't even know the incident happended until the lawsuit was filled, she could have done taht in the parking lot or something too! Who knows!

Bugwit:
Ok, so now you have to tell me who is #1!!! They better be real...cause mine are!

MyUtopia:
Yes they are!

Kayla said...

Could have been worse..
She could have slid in her own drunk vomit and shattered her pelvis.
HA!
Of course then she would sue the pub for serving her too much alcohol, or for unsanitary conditions of not cleaning up her hurl

Ewwwwww

Jenny! said...

Kayla:
Ha ha ha! She probably would have sued for her hurl!

mjd said...

If I am ever crazy enough to dance on the bar, which I might be, I definitely will not be crazy enough to sue. It is bad enough that the bar patrons know about the depths (or I guess heighths) of our depravity. Why would we call attention to our ineptitude by suing?

Thanks for your kind comment on my Indiana post on Sunshine's blog.

Jenny! said...

MJD:
Your welcome! Thanks for visiting me too! This girl is going be made out ot be a huge idiot, why would anyone want taht kind of verbal degrading punishment?

Mighty Dyckerson said...

I would be happy to suck your sugar tits, darling.

Crushed by Ingsoc said...

Sadly, can't oblige- I'm quite slender....

Jenny! said...

Dyckerson:
I gave them a fresh coat of honey this morning!

Crushed:
Slender dudes can have bitch tits too! They just aren't as meaty!

Bugwit said...

Sorry, can't divulge #1. I think they're real. I'll let you know...

Fever Dog said...

I bet she's huge, as well

Jenny! said...

Bugwit:
Hmmm, very mysterious...please tell me it's not Angelina Jolie! Her tits are dreadful!

Fever Dog:
Yes!

honkeie2 said...

This is why I say lawyers are killing our country. Too many ppl sueing because they were stoopid. Of cource the coffee burned you, you asked for hot coffee didnt you?

Bugwit said...

No, not Angie. Not Gwyneth Paltrow, either. Hers are like two socks with some wet sand in them.

Paul Champagne said...

Another "Coyote Ugly" moment ... don't they have an original bone in their bodies (broken ones but no original ones).