Monday, September 10, 2007

Spunk For Sale!

I found this bottle containing a substance which looks suspiciously like splooge in a gift shop this weekend. Why would I pay nine dollars for baby batter when I can get it at home for free? I wonder how many men had to bust their nut to fill a 12oz bottle?Spunk rocks!

63 comments:

Ashley said...

Where the hell have you been shopping?!?!?!

I am first again!!!

abstractjenn said...

Jesus Jenny.....I think I just threw up a little in my mouth.

I have it on good authority that it took 9 1/2 men to fill that bottle.

Christie said...

That is just too gross.

Flyinfox_SATX said...

Who said it had to come from a man? Gene Simmons on Family Jewels showed us that Bull Spunk is not descernable from men's spunk. And they can put out gallons!

Flyinfox_SATX

Sarah said...

Was I there when you saw that???? What the hell was I doing?

Keshi said...

ewwwwwww what on earth is that!!!!

Keshi.

Mighty Dyckerson said...

Is it carbonated? Then it would be fizzy jizz!

Yoda said...

"I wonder how many men had to bust their nut to fill a 12oz bottle?"

Unfortunately, only I am to blame.

Stan!! said...

If it's splooge, it looks like a particularly fine vintage.

The inside of me said...

That is sick. I think most women prefer it right from the source. That's why I am offering my services. Just for you though Jenny. :)

captain corky said...

I love a girl who has a healthy attitude towards a jar of spunk. Am I pervert?

Crashdummie said...

Okie dokie, there went my lunch!

ADW said...

I was wondering where I put that. I try and fill a tub with t once a week and just soak my troubles away. Thank goodness I'm sterile.

-Papa said...

Something tells me you're one of those very rare women, worth her weight in gold, because you don't have a gag reflex. ;P

Loaf said...

Must have had some guy hooked up to a milking machine for that lot!

honkeie2 said...

You can now make those wacky japanese videos with women covered in spooge without even seeing a man's wanker!

Akelamalu said...

Tell me it's not.... please?

electro-kevin said...

I thought that 'spunk' meant courage in the USA.

I bet Tony Blair regrets offering George Bush some good old British spunk.

BTW - spunk is really good for the skin, girls. Spread it all over your face and it gets rid of wrinkles. In your hair it makes great conditioner.

You need lots of it, regularly for it to work - it also needs to be fresh. The bottled stuff will simply not do.

zen wizard said...

The splooge appears to be separating.

It must be that the Einsteins and the future Mr. Universe's rise to the top, and the Forrest Gump's and the Sling Blade's are on the bottom.

So use the top part for baby batter and save the bottom for face cream or whatever.

minijonb said...

Splooge! (TM) ...now available in regular and diet!!!

Crushed by Ingsoc said...

Less than you'd think, I suspect.

Twenty?

*~*Cece*~* said...

Baby Makin' Juice for sale! hehehehe

Fever Dog said...

Did you get a turkey baster with it?

Superstar said...

Let me guess...You were fresh out of spooge and you are now shopping for it?!?!?! I think you might have been at the healthfood shopping center.

Paul Champagne said...

It could have been just one man ... recently released from 20 years in prison perhaps?

Em said...

Did they only have one bottle on the shelf? Or did they have a shelf full of man juice?

Jenny! said...

Ashley:
That was at Hala Kahiki's gift shop!

AbstractJenn:
9 sounds just about right!

Christie:
Too gross...agreed...but I LOVE it!

FlyinFox:
I would prefer to think that it was human spunk...not animal! It was really not either...but seriously...looked like spunk to me!

Sarah:
Yes...you were there! I think you were the fluffer!

Keshi:
It's coconut syrup...but looks like spunk to me!

Dyck:
Yummm, fizzy jizz...great aftertaste too!

Yoda:
I knew you had a side job!

Stan!!:
It's a rare vintage of splooge...very expensive...and good wiht cheese!

Inside of Me:
Fresh is best!

Captain:
No...not a pervert! Jizz is yummy!

Crashdummie:
Ooopss...sorry! Does that only look appetizing to me???

ADW:
It's so warm...I bet that would be quite relaxing!

Papa:
And what on earth would give you that impression??? I am definetly a gem!

Loaf:
The Jizz-a-nator 3000 actually! Works well by combining nipple play and prostate probing!

Honkeie2:
Bukake would not be the same without the wanker!

Akelamalu:
No...it's actually coconut syrup!

Electro:
Agreed....fresh is best! Not only is it good for you skin...but when ingested it can give you a protein boost...fuck those protein shakes...give me a can of jizz!

Zen:
Good call...don't want to accidentally injest stupid people sperm!

MiniJonB:
Yumm....I'll have two of the regulars please!

Crushed:
I think less than 20...maybe like 12 seems like a good number. I should start and experiment!

Cece:
It's like fertility clinics...but this is for drinking, not turkey basting!

Fever Dog:
Ha ha ha! No, but it did come with a straw!

SuperStar:
Not only is it good for you...but it tastes good too!

Paul:
Prison bitches jerk it far too much to fill that...what else do you do in prison but whack off???

Em:
They had just a couple of bottles on man juice...if they had a whole shelf...that would have been sweet!

George said...

Ya ... it is gross but reminds me of a bad porn vid I saw a long time ago ... this dude would collect pussy juice, bottle it and sell it as a perfume/aphrodisiac

Sassy Blondie said...

Ewww. Just ewww.

Jenny! said...

George:
That is nasty! But it reminds me of that movie coming out...I think with Christian Bale...called Perfume or Scent or something like that.

Sassy:
Sorry...I find it particularly entertaining!

AmitL said...

Hi,there...coming here via Keshi's blog..and,since your first post made me ROFL,I must return later in the day and check out other posts..Re. this one..urghhh..they actually sell that now in shops??...LOL at ur comment on getting it at home for free.

Stacie said...

I have a bottle of coconut pancake syrup in my fridge that looks exactly like this. Next time I have pancakes, there's a good chance I will think of this post and puke. I should thank you for that I suppose, because it will not only turn me off pancakes, but also coconut syrup. This will be great for my diet. In fact...I think that I will just come here and read this post next time I think about food...
Stacie

Keshi said...

omg yukkkkkk!

btw I wud rather hv spunk than that LOL ok Im kidding!

Jen see if u hv some stories to share in my current post..tnxx!

Keshi.

RAFFI said...

finally, thank you for finding my donation to the world sperm bank to help breed superhumans

TheBirdman33 said...

That is a good morning for me, and I taste fantastic

TheBirdman33 said...

I just filled a bottle like that a few minutes ago

Nocturnal said...

That thing definitely looks sexual.

Cheers

mutleythedog said...

I think it is some kind of yoghurt drink... what is splooge?

Lightning Bug's Butt said...

You strike me as a girl who prefers it straight from the tap.

honkeie2 said...

for get canned swimmers, I have it fresh on the pull ;-)

phishez_rule said...

You're not that hard up for sperm donors are you?

snowelf said...

omg...

I... no, that's it...just omg...

:)
--snow

VE said...

Rumor had it that was pumped from Rod Stewart's stomach years ago...

Brian in Oxford said...

Shake well.

I was told that splooge specifically referred to the cum-poop combo from gay men's butts after sex. But that looks poop-free.

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

That spunk has gone bad. I don't think it's supposed to separate like that.

Dan said...

Yuck!!

You have splooge on your mind.

random moments said...

I just spewed Lean Cuisine on my 'puter screen. I'm so not cleaning it up...

Heart Of Darkness said...

People will buy anything... *sigh*

zen wizard said...

I just noticed the $9 price tag--has this splooge passed FDA inspection, or is this black market splooge?

I would go broke producing that much splooge for $9 unless I could get porno movies and Jergens lotion at third world prices.

Jenny! said...

Amitl:
Welcome! Glad you were on the floor! Why pay for the stuff...anyone can get it for free!

Stacie:
It actually is coconut syrup...but seriously...that looks like splooge to me! I wish that turned off my appetite...but for some reason, it just makes me more hungry!

Keshi:
Ha ha...I will check it out...I always have something ot share!

Raffi:
If we procreated...we could creat a superhot humans!

Birdman:
Your like the Energizer Bunny...you keep cumming and cumming and cumming!

Nocturnal:
Yes it does...thats what makes it so appealing!

Mutley:
Splooge is what happens when your red rocket gets too excited!

Bugs Butt:
Fresh is best...who wouldn't want it from the tap...that's half the fun!

Honkeie2:
Pull your dick and swimmers come out? How big's your dick?

Phishez:
Being hard is a prerequisite for splooge!

Snow:
When you come to CHicago...I will buy you a bottle!

VE:
Rob's stomach or his whore daughter?

Brian In Oxford:
I like Grade A spunk...no contaminents...all natural!

Jenny the Bloggess:
You let anything sit for long enougyh it's bound to seperate...just give it a good hard shaking!

Dan:
Guys think about tits...I think about splooge!

Random Moments:
Sorry to have ruined your lunch...Lean Cuisine sounds really appetizing too!

Heart of Darkness:
If you produce...they will buy it!

Zen:
I would hate to think of the quality porn that you could get at a third world price. Probably some tribal tits swinging around...so not appealing! Doctors offices give out free samples of lotion though!

Slick said...

So uh...did it taste good?? ;)

In Ink said...

At approximately 5cc a go, there was some serious bishop bashing going on to fill that puppy.

Ryan said...

I would love to sit here and comment, but they are paying me almost 5 bucks a bottle. I'm not good at typing with just one hand....

back to work!

SMARTBuddy said...

Urrrghhh...........

-Papa said...

And what on earth would give you that impression???
Could it be the bottle of spunk of for sale? ;)

Princess Extraordinaire said...

Splooge looks very suspicious....

Sgt said...

I thought maybe you were shopping at one of those Babies-To-Go places.

Jason said...

very very odd

randy of the redwoods said...

That's my man juice. It took me three days to fill that bottle.

Jenny! said...

Slick:
It was delicious!

In Ink:
Bishop bashing is a sin...so is flogging the dolphin!

Ryan:
Whose your boss...that's slave labor right there! I would pay you 6.25 plus dental!

Smartbuddy:
Urghh....in a good way...or a throw up in your mouth way?

Papa:
Well, I didn't buy it!

Princess Extrodenaire:
Suspicious splooge is the best kind! You never know what its going to taste like!

Sgt:
No...it was Babies-In-A-Bottle...its a franchise...you want ot buy one?

Jason:
You've never seen splooge before???

Redwoods Randy:
Three days? You need ot whack off more!

The Man at the Pub said...

Eeeewwwwwwwwww!!!

MyUtopia said...

That whole airline thing is just silly!

* Check out my big announcement on my blog

Claudia said...

lmfao.. so while my kid (one of em anyways) is sick and passed out on the floor I am sitting here spending way too much time on teh computer when I should be making Turkey stew.. and I stumble on your blog and Im loving it.